Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Do They Make 5 Minute Hair Color?

This is a serious question. "Do they make 5 minute hair color?"
And if they don't, please try to answer my next question... "Why am I stupid?"

Backstory: My hair was totally beautiful blonde when I was younger. My hair turned a nice redish dark blonde around high school. In college it was a dark blonde with reddish highlights. By post college it was dishwater blonde with dark red streaks.

Beatiful - Pretty - Cute - Dumpy. That is my "Hair History."

I started coloring it around the "Dishwater" stage. I've colored it strawberry blonde, champange blonde, golden blonde... oodles of different blondes. But every product still takes precisly 30 minutes to color your hair.

I can get through the first 10 minutes no problem. At that point I initiate the "Household Warning System" by saying "Okay everyone, in precisly 10 minutes I have to spread the color from my roots to the rest of my hair. If you need anything, ask it now."

Nothing. No answers. I might as well talk to the wall. 9 minutes go by. The "Household Warning System" goes to red alert. "Okay... you have one minute, then I need to finish my hair!"

30 seconds go by and I dared to dream of a peaceful hair experience.

In the last 30 seconds of my "Operational Window To Complete Hair Coloring" Abby needed water, the cats climbed up my pants to beg for crunchies, the dog whined at the door threatening to pee if I didn't let her out, and last..... the last three seconds as I sprint to the bathroom to finish the job, my husband goes in there, shuts the door, and announces that he's having his own emergency and can't open the door for a few minutes.

10 minutes go by. It's too late. I have to wash the 'root coloring' out.

The top of my hair is now a different color than the rest of it.

And so I ask you, kind readers.... Do they make a 5 minute hair color, and if not, will you please tell me why I was stupid enough to try and do a time sensitive project FOR ME while everyone else was still awake in the house?


Anonymous said...

Auntie mary I think your hair color is beautiful! I really don't think you need to dye it a bunch of colors. When we go on vacation put lemon juice in your highlights. Thats what I'm doin. It makes your highlights lighter than your hair color! And no, sorry I haven't heard of 5 minute hair color!

Elle said...

Clairol makes 10 minute hair color...


Balancing Act said...

There is the 10 minute color as Elle points out.

ahem-Kathy said...

I'm sure Clorox bleach can do it in 5 minutes. They have a wide variety of scents these days. LOL I remember just going to the bathroom was a fly by